Today’s program examines the myth that true love is unambivalent; that if you’re in love, you’ll feel that love consistently and without conflict, and will be happy.
But we shortchange our own emotional natures when we think that our feelings should be constant and unwavering and singular, when in fact they’re always mixed. The coexistence of positive and negative feelings toward someone, or something, simultaneously drawing us in opposite directions, is our psychic makeup.
Whether you find Mr. Right or not has nothing to do with a woman’s complicated yearnings for many things at once. And vice versa. We’re just not simple creatures. We don’t want to be alone, but we don’t want to be invaded. We want to win someone, but when we do, we also long for the time when he was unwinnable.
It’s called being human, and it’s the topic of this week’s In HeynSight. Enjoy!