I’d rather talk about weightier issues than relationship etiquette, but I just heard for the second time this week about another person who ended a relationship by email. I can’t stand it: How rude and cowardly can you get? It was a woman, alas, so we can’t blame it on gender cluelessness.. She said she just “didn’t have it in me” to do it in person “after two years of being together”– which is clueless.
You HAVE to do it in person. You just have to avoid these five pitfalls:
1. Don’t try to win his approval. You can’t reject a partner and simultaneously get his blessing. You’re here to do dirty work and you both know it. So do it without asking for reassurance.
2. Don’t ask “Can we just be friends?” Ick. You’re not in high school. Why pretend your offer of not sleeping with someone anymore is an exciting opportunity? Why pretend that cavalierly offering to take someone’s love but not his body is anything but a booby prize? Have respect for your former lover’s comprehension abilities. You may end up friends, but it’ll be awhile if it happens.